Traduction anglaise

I was thinking perhaps I should provide a translation of these Valentine verses (especially since my hubby and prime Valentine has great mastery of only certain words in French), and then I had an idea for an experiment. How about I try my hand at translating… and then let the InterWeb have a go… and see which one we like best!

First, the original again:

Lorsque tu seras vieux et que je serai vieille
Lorsque mes cheveux blonds seront des cheveux blancs,
Au mois de mai, dans le jardin qui s’ensoleille,
Nous irons réchauffer nos vieux membres tremblants.

Comme le renouveau mettra nos coeurs en fête,
Nous nous croirons encore de jeunes amoureux;
Et je te sourirai tout en branlant la tête,
Et nous ferons un couple adorable de vieux.

Lovely stuff. Now, here’s my amateurish attempt – I don’t feel comfortable yet straying from the translation to do rhymes and such:

When you are old and I am old
When my blond hair has become white hair,
In the month of May, in the garden bathed in sunlight,
We’ll go warm up our old trembling limbs.

As the renewal puts celebration in our hearts,
We’ll believe ourselves young lovers still;
And I will smile at you as I shake my head,
And we’ll make an adorable old couple.

Here’s the attempt by Yahoo! Babel Fish:

When you are old and that I will be old
When my fair hair is grey hair,
In May, in the garden which shines upon,
We will heat our old trembling members.

As the revival will put our hearts in festival,
We will still believe ourselves of young people in love;
And I will smile you while shaking the head,

And we will make an adorable couple of old man.

And finally, Google Translate:

When you are old and I am old
When will my blonde hair white hair
In May, the garden s’ensoleille,
We’ll warm our old limbs trembling.

As the revival will our hearts in celebration,
We will believe even young lovers;
And I’ll smile while shaking his head,
And we’ll do a couple of lovely old.

******

Huh. Now that I look at these… I’m pretty sure I didn’t win. But at least it proves my proclamation to my Grade 9 French students from back in the day: if you use an internet translator, I WILL KNOW.