Captain Marvel Movie Review by an Average Feminist Mom

The new Captain Marvel movie, starring Brie Larson, was a rousing worldwide success when it opened this past weekend. Normally, I do not follow box office results – I don’t see lots of movies at the theatre and usually not even close to opening weekend. However, Sean and I made a point of seeing Captain Marvel on Monday (almost still opening weekend) partly because it was his birthday weekend and he has been a Marvel fan since before it was cool – and partly to stick it to the trolls.

Don’t worry, this review is not going to go into depth about how the most misogynist Marvel “fans” were so determined to express their disapproval of Brie Larson (who not only played the most powerful Marvel superhero while simultaneously being female but also dared to call attention to the white-male-dominated field of film criticism – and Hollywood in general – and its too-little effort at diversity) by submitting malignant one-star reviews to everywhere before the film was even released, thus revealing their own pathetic inability to cope with life and inciting both RottenTomatoes and YouTube to tweak their algorithms to counteract the bias.

Nope, I’m going to talk about the film itself. No major plot spoilers, maybe just good-moment spoilers.

  • As is the standard these days with Marvel movies, the writing is good, it made us laugh – and it also made me teary-eyed at one point. Thumbs up.
  • Some male supremacists critics said that Brie Larson’s performance is wooden or overly stoic in this movie. I disagree. It’s important to keep in mind that her character, Carol Danvers, has a) been training to master her emotions and b) had her memory damaged. But also, “wooden” didn’t even occur to me as I watched. I enjoyed what I perceived as a calm, smart, somewhat taciturn character – maybe even a bit shy – who is thinking hard, figuring stuff out as she goes. To me, she’s relatable. (Me being the Paragon of Calm and all, ha.)
  • Similarly, she owned her resting bitch face. (Which, to clarify, is more of a fierce “taking care of business” face.) And for the asinine legions who want her – and women in general – to smile more, the movie satisfyingly addresses that. And so do the creative netizens who photoshopped smiles onto male superheroes to demonstrate that it makes no sense.
  • It’s cool to see her running barefoot for a while at one point early in the movie. I wonder whose idea that was. And then, when she puts her boots on, hallelujah, there are no noticeable heels on those suckers. That’s one of my pet peeves – when women on TV who have serious shit to get done are doing it in spike heels. Ugh. High heels literally throw humans out of alignment and off balance – thus, they fall into my category of “apparel designed to keep women down.”
  • It must also be mentioned that the uniform Brie Larson wears as a Kree soldier is the same as the one Jude Law wears – and the rest of the soldiers. Tailored to her, of course, but fully protective (not seductive).
  • The fight-training scene at the beginning between Brie Larson and Jude Law is visually great. It’s not all close up and chaotic and shaky-cam, like so many fight scenes – it’s atmospheric and convincing and full of cool shapes. And it’s gratifying to find out that Brie Larson did most of her own stunts in the moviewow. She did some serious superhero training for the role.
  • I dug the Earth-based soundtrack of 90s jams – mostly by women. Nice touch. Also, Carol’s band T-shirts, especially the last one. 🙂
  • It is so cool, and also a bit creepy, that they’re able to take Samuel L. Jackson and Clark Gregg, acting in the present day, and make them appear 25 years younger. How??? Apparently the company that specializes in this digital time travel is Lola FX. I don’t know how they do it, I just know it’s amazing. The effects are so seamless, you completely forget that these actors aren’t so dewy anymore.
  • I loved Lashana Lynch as Carol’s best friend, Maria Rambeau. Tough, savvy, and full of love at the same time. And she nailed the American accent – I had no clue that she’s British.

  • In fact, I loved the dynamic between the two women. Reading about the film afterwards, it was interesting to see comments on how Carol has no love interest in the movie. At first I was like, “Why should she have a love interest? Because she’s a woman??” But then I realized – most male superheroes do, especially in their origin stories. Spiderman, Iron Man, Captain America, Thor (can’t remember about the Hulk), Star Lord, T’Challa… not to mention (switching universes) Superman and Batman…. They all have a romance as a motivator at some point. I did not even notice that Carol has no romance – probably because the friendship is so beautifully done. And frankly, the movie is full of love – friendships, family, pets, you name it.
  • Little things I appreciated: Goose the cat doing all those kitty things; Samuel L. Jackson singing “Please Mr. Postman” (quite well!); Brie Larson’s messy hair; Annette Bening in general.
  • Overarching messages I appreciated even more: emotions and interpersonal connections as assets; single moms as superheroes; the importance of knowing and treating ALL people as people; the goal not to win wars, but to end wars; and the essential nature of perseverance in this human life – especially the female human life. (That last part is what made me teary-eyed.)
  • And finally – this one deserves its own bullet – “I don’t have to prove anything to you.” YES YES YES. This moment is so satisfying, Sean and I both did the quiet cheer in our seats. This moment is Shut up, manipulating coward-boys, it’s not about you. I have more important things to do in life. BOOM.
  • Were there things I didn’t like? Well, I don’t know. It’s violent, as most comic-hero-based movies are built to be. It’s not my favourite movie in the world – a superhero movie will probably never be that for me. But kudos to the team that made this film happen, because it’s a big step into territory that needs thorough plumbing. Maybe once the female superheroes are as ubiquitous as the male ones, we will see the ignorant boycotter types shuffle off the way of the dodo, where they belong.

***

P.S. Did you know Brie Larson was a Six Chick in 13 Going On 30? (She’s the one in blue.) Just a point in her favour, in my opinion. She got to practice that RBF early.

P. P. S. I enjoyed this article about the movie (though it’s slightly more spoiler-y) from an intriguing website I’d never seen called The Good Men Project. Digital fist bump to you, male feminists! <3


 

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How Eating Smarties Can Light Your Tap Water on Fire

Do you ever have those times when you read or see something alarming and think,

Shit, this is it. We are GOING DOWN FOR SURE THIS TIME. Humans are SCREWED.

I have thought this many times. When I was a kid in the ’80s, raised (and homeschooled) by liberal activist parents, I was pretty well-versed in environmental problems even before my age reached double digits. (We watched David Suzuki’s The Nature of Things regularly.) It seemed likely to Mini-Di that we would pollute ourselves to death pretty soon.

Then I took World Issues in high school (back when Ontario still had Grade 13), and was convinced that our little planet would not be able to handle the projected human population; we’d run out of food – and livable space – by 6.5 billion.

Amazingly, here we are. We’re still truckin’, well past 7 billion. I’m not quite sure how, but who am I to question?

This week, with another Earth Day behind us and May Day upon us, I’m mad at Nestlé. Again.

Yes, it’s Nestlé. “Good Food, Good Life.” Wholesome purveyor of Smarties, Perrier, and infant emaciation.

nestle-boycott-twins
This mother was told she would only have enough milk for one of her twins. She ended up with only one twin.

There has been a boycott of Nestlé since the 1970s, because of their aggressive promotion of infant formula in developing countries, where mothers have been persuaded to formula-feed, but are unable to make formula that is safe for babies to drink, due to water contamination, language barriers, etc.

no-nestle
Boycott Nestle

Last week, there was news that this oh-so-virtuous company, the largest food company in the world, has chalked up another point for greed:

Nigella sativa — more commonly known as fennel flower — has been used as a cure-all remedy for over a thousand years. It treats everything from vomiting to fevers to skin diseases, and has been widely available in impoverished communities across the Middle East and Asia.

But now Nestlé is claiming to own it, and filing patent claims around the world to try and take control over the natural cure of the fennel flower and turn it into a costly private drug. (From GlobalResearch.)

Classy move. Clearly they’re hurtin’ for cash. Nestlé has put a “clarification” (denial) on their website, because once the internet got ahold of this, it didn’t look very good on them. Gee, if it doesn’t look good… DON’T WEAR IT IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Then there’s the incredible mercenary attitude that is jeopardizing the water that Wellington County relies on.

Nestle photo

Nestlé Waters is the world’s largest bottled water company, and Wellington County in southwestern Ontario is home to its largest bottling facility in Canada. Under its current permit, Nestlé pays $3.71 for every million litres of water it pumps from the local watershed, which it then packages in single-use plastic bottles and sells back to the public for as much as $2 million!

Despite reaping enormous profits from bottling a shared public resource, Nestlé is now arguing for an even better deal. One of the mandatory conditions built into its water-taking permit requires Nestlé to reduce pumping by 10-20 per cent during times of drought. In a recent appeal to the Environmental Review Tribunal (ERT), Nestlé has requested these restrictions be removed.

In a stunning move the Ministry of Environment (MOE) has agreed to a settlement which would weaken the conditions and potentially allow for Nestlé to pump at its maximum rate during droughts. We believe this puts Nestlé’s profit-making interests before the water rights of the people of Wellington County. (From The Council of Canadians.)

I live in Wellington County. It blows my mind when I see people in my very own city, drinking the same water that pours from their taps – out of bottles marked “Nestlé Waters”. It is an impressive feat, this brainwashing that has convinced us that water is automatically better from a disposable bottle.

THEN I read this article in the Guelph Mercury, written by a Community Editorial Board member, Cynthia Bragg, who happens to be a friend of mine. I highly recommend you read the whole thing, especially if you live in Wellington County, but here are some highlights:

Syncrude's toxic tailings pond in alberta
The Syncrude tailings pond and oilsands facility seen from a helicopter near Fort McMurray, Alta., in 2012. Jeff McIntosh/The Canadian Press

Let’s zoom in on one area of Canada: the Alberta oilsands. To produce one million barrels of oil a day, industry requires withdrawals of enough water from the Athabasca River to sustain a city of one million people, every year. But by 2020, the oilsands are expected to produce five million barrels of oil a day. In spite of constant recycling, most of the water never returns to the river. It ends up in toxic tailings ponds. […]

Las Vegas and the entire State of California are under real threat of running out of water this century, and the Hoover Dam will stop producing electricity if the water level falls by about 12 metres.

In all the Great Lakes, water levels are at an all times low as hot dry summers cause more water to evaporate than our reduced rainfall and snowmelt can replace. Cargo ships have had to reduce their loads to avoid being grounded. At one popular Michigan fishing spot, salmon were seen flopping in the mud.

In Ontario, 65 major creeks and rivers that flow out of the Oak Ridges Moraine already have lost as much as two thirds of their water. Yet golf courses are still permitted to draw three million litres a day for 180 days.

In case you don’t know, extraction of oil from the oilsands is what necessitates fracking, a process that imbues water with so many chemicals that it actually becomes flammable.

gasland_clip tap water on fire
Just add a spark.

Fracking, or horizontal hydraulic fracturing, is cleverly and understandably illustrated here.  It is being committed all over Canada.

This article rounds up a whole buffet of threats to our water. It’s a reminder that if you add them all up, it’s one lethal situation. It makes me want to use melodramatic terms like evil and doomed. YOU CANNOT JUST FUCK WITH THE WATER SUPPLY. (Yes. I used the actual word for once.) Forget car crashes and drug addictions and bullying and anorexia and sexual assault. If we don’t have a system of drinkable water, that’s it. We – and countless other species, both animal and vegetable – are DONE.

I know it’s a bummer that I’m bringing this up. I know this is really depressing reading. I know we’d all rather think about the spring flowers and sunshine and our plans for next weekend. And that’s very easy to do, when you live far away from any tailings ponds or flopping salmon.

But we need to make sure that we, as a species, are not so dumb and arrogant as to forget our dependence on existing natural systems, forget that we can indeed poison ourselves, if we’re not careful.

Here’s the good news, though: we are not that dumb. We are still growing, still polluting, but also innovating all the time. That’s the thing about humans: we manifest all the idiocy and brilliance in the world. We can do almost anything we can imagine, healing or toxic.

I admit, I’m not the kind of exemplary environmentalist that Mini-Di could be unequivocally proud of. I drive a car on a regular basis. There are bananas in my kitchen that travelled way too far to get here. I sometimes buy beverages in disposable cups even though I totally know better. But that doesn’t mean I can’t take small steps to help. All of our small steps add up, just as surely as those taken by the fracking oil execs.

Dear Wellingtonians, please click to visit Wellington Water Watchers and learn, donate, volunteer, or even just read Nestlé’s Twitter-based attempts to pretend they don’t suck. (A bit of comic relief.)

To learn more about fracking and/or sign a petition against it, please visit the Council of Canadians.

Thank you so much for reading.

P.S. I’m aware that eating Smarties does not actually light your tap water on fire. But all the water in the world is connected. And so are all the Smarties.

***


 

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