#NaBloPoMo, Day 5: My Hubbibi

Whew. Just weathered a Mammoth Meltdown (one of many in the last three years, but this was definitely in the top ten), courtesy of my three-year-old. The better part of an hour of screaming/crying, along with intermittent hitting/kicking. All this – at least initially – because I wouldn’t let her put the cap back on her toothpaste. (Actually, I did let her, and then when she took it off again so she could lick the inside of it, she lost her chance.)

MAN, it’s hard work, sticking to your guns. But the worse things get, the more you have to stick, because otherwise you’re telling the child this works – this gets you what you want.

I don’t really want to talk or write about it. But I do want to mention my gratitude for my Hubbibi today. For being level-headed, for being my tag-team, for being a good sport, for being a great story reader, for being willing to listen and improve, for helping me improve, for being straight with me, for taking straight talk from me, and for giving the best hugs in the world. Oh, and for cleaning the eavestroughs today.

You’re an amazing guy, honey. I love you.

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6 thoughts on “#NaBloPoMo, Day 5: My Hubbibi

  1. emerge says:

    Oh man! Top-ten meltdown? Criminy. Why do they have to happen at bedtime? 🙁 I mean, I can actually totally sympathise with her on wanting to lick the toothpaste lid. I really get that. But not the nuclear explosion resulting from being thwarted in this! It’s just not worth the time and energy, let alone the wear and tear. 🙁 Hope you’re okay.

    Your husband is awesome in my book too. Well done.

    • dilovelyadmin says:

      I’m pretty sure you’ve been witness to at least one other meltdown in that top ten list… And it’s true, the nuclear explosion is never (in my mind) worth the time and energy. I guess that’s the trick – figuring out why it IS worth it to her.

  2. Mama says:

    Sorry about that! The meltdown, I mean. I think she spent too long being good with the guest-mom today and just had to even things out. Thank heavens for an awesome hubby!

    • dilovelyadmin says:

      Oh, I think she still would have melted down with her guest-mom if she’d needed to during the day… I try to believe it’s just fluke.

  3. Auntie CL says:

    Not much that can’t be done with a stable functional tag team! Good for both of you!
    Having a dramatic child (especially if you first had a compliant child) is so challenging. (My mother thought so!) But you are SO absolutely right about the importance of sticking to your “guns”. Good for you for being strong. Any lapse I had in that area had to be paid for for a long long time.
    p.s. does she have a safe place to melt down on her own without having to have a tired-out witness?

    • dilovelyadmin says:

      Ooh, were YOU the dramatic child, Auntie CL?

      I think ALL parents have lapses in the sticking… Consistency can be incredibly hard. I guess there must be a lot of factors that go into how we pay for it later (I still don’t know how I’ll be paying for my lapses, or if I’m already paying for some I’ve made in the past).

      She does have places she can melt down on her own, but one of the things that makes her very upset – at least in principle – is when you leave. If I do ever leave her upset, I explain that it’s because she’s hurting my ears or I need a break, and I come check on her soon. But at times I think I actually escalate her just by being present, because she’ll often start to wane as soon as I leave the room. Sigh… it’s confusing.

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