You Gotta Love SPAM

I am glad to be blogging in such a user-friendly age. (This is partly because I know very little about actual, real web design. I wouldn’t even blog if it weren’t for WordPress… and my dad.) WordPress makes a handy-dandy plugin (customizable feature) called Akismet, which is the reason I have never had my server crash due to too much spam.


I assume somewhere there are actual people involved in making and sending “comment spam” to blogs, but it’s a mostly automated process. I was mystified as to the point of comment spam, so I did a little research. It has to do with improving one’s rating on Google PageRank, and playing the odds of how many bloggers will click a link before deleting it, thus getting their site some page hits.

I like to take a look in my spam page sometimes, just to see what’s there. Some comments are undisguised advertisements, but most are something generic like “Nice job writing that thing you wrote.” They strike me, in a way, as more nefarious than the ads, because they are trying to sound as if they could have actually read your blog when they haven’t WHATSOEVER. But some I like, because they make me chuckle. I’ve collected a few for your reading pleasure.

This first one I’ve entitled “The Ironic Suck-Up”. This author knows that we all just wanna be cool.

Youre so cool! I dont suppose Ive read anything like this before. So nice to find somebody with some original thoughts on this subject. realy thank you for starting this up. this website is something that is needed on the web, someone with a little originality. useful job for bringing something new to the internet!

Thanks! I can tell you really care about originality.

Next we have another in the same vein, just a little shorter, sweeter, and quirkier:

Many thanks! I truly love the guide, in reality I presume a person need your thumbs upward.

Those upward-thumbs mean a lot to me.

And there’s this little gem:

The gieuns store called, they\’re running out of you.

Yeeaaah… Whoever runs the gieuns store, I don’t think they called YOU.

Then there’s this one I call “Thesaurus in Overdrive”.

I see a very good improvement with your creating, Id appreciate to obtain in touch. Preserve up the good operate! Your creating is extremely inspirational for any person who’s new to this kind of things.

I guess “I’d like to keep in touch. Keep up the good work!” was sounding kinda tired.

This one is so emotional, I’m not sure what to make of it… but I sure am glad I mysteriously saved this person’s well-being with my blog.

I precisely desired to appreciate you again. I am not sure the things I might have taken care of in the absence of those aspects contributed by you about my concern. It had been a very horrifying condition in my circumstances, however , coming across your professional avenue you solved it took me to jump with joy. Now i’m happier for this work and then believe you are aware of a powerful job you happen to be providing instructing others by way of a web site. I’m certain you’ve never come across all of us.

Yes, I’m certain I never have.

Here’s another one from another good friend I’ve “never come across”… and it’s completely genuine.

Well… to be completely genuine, My partner and i has not been expecting to come across these kinds of information unintentionally, because I did, simply because I merely came across your blog submit while I was actually running a search in AOL, searching for a thing extremely shut but not exactly the same… Nevertheless at this time I am over happy to be below and also I’d like to include that your perception is quite interesting despite the fact that a little bit controversial towards the identified… I would declare it really is up to controversy… nevertheless Now i’m afraid to allow you to an enemy, ha, ‘, ha… However, in case you want to talk in greater detail regarding it, you need to response to our review and I’m going to make sure to sign up to ensure I’m going to be informed and come back again in charge of much more… Your own hopeful buddy

Aw, I miss you so much, my own hopeful buddy. But I’m not sure what that joke was about.

Here are some cute shorties:

I’m a weblog crazy man or woman we desire to learn cool weblog for example the ones you have.

These pointers are actually as a result a fact

Hey there, That i investigate your whole writings, place them on its way.

Boom shakalaka boom boom, polrbem solved.

I think some of these, um, people have polrbems beyond what I can fix.

This one I’m dubbing “The International Special”:

Grande borne! Agradecimentos para tomar a treasure l’ordre de escrever algo qui age realmente leitura accomplish valor. Demasiado frequentemente european union encontro a good informa??i in?¡ì2til electronic d?e a good algo cual e realmente relevante. Agradecimentos para seu trabalho duro.

We’ve got (at least) English, French, Spanish, Portuguese… but I’m pretty sure it’s still saying the same thing as all the others.

This one is priceless, considering it was posted to my birth blog.

Nice one for revealing your notions within this blog page. Moreover, a good fantasy with regards to the banks purposes any time dealing with property foreclosures is the standard bank won’t have my expenses. We have a lot of your time that the loan provider involves monthly payments from time to time. If you are in addition deep inside opening, they will generally would like you pay the true payment totally. However, i am not saying on the grounds that they’ll have any repayment schedules at all. In the event you along with the standard bank could have the ability to function one thing out and about, the precise home foreclosure procedure may well discontinue. Nonetheless, if you ever continue to keep skip installments underneath the brand-new program, the exact property property foreclosures practice can pick up in which this allowed to remain off of.

Of course, if you figure that compliments are passé, a nice alternative is to disparage:

Hey, you used to write magnificent, but the last several posts have been kinda boring… I miss your tremendous writings. Past several posts are just a little bit out of track! come on!

Finally… anyone know what to make of this one?





9 thoughts on “You Gotta Love SPAM

  1. bd says:

    We need to get on-message about our functional strategic flexibility. The consultants recommend facilitating relative time-phases. Only geeks stuck in the 90s still go for knowledge-based digital resources. At base level, this just comes down to total reciprocal flexibility. We need a more contemporary reimagining of our responsive modular innovation.

  2. Lanie says:

    There is an awful lot of spam in the world. I have gotten the “you are so cool” one. The “boom shakalka” makes me smile. Is the comment above mine spam? Take care.

  3. diblog says:

    Lanie, it’s because you ARE so cool! And that convincing “spam” comment above yours is my sardonic big brother.

    bd: HAR HAR. Your problem is you spelled everything right. You will never get a job as a spam commenter like that.

  4. Amanda says:

    Well I thank you also for revealing your notions on this blog page.

    Hahahaaa! I had no idea you got spam comments!!

  5. emerge says:

    um… I don’t obtain it. I guess you have to be a gieuns (or shut) to understand this blog submit.

    birth blog > foreclosures? monthly payments? deep inside opening??? ha, ‘, ha… Nice one.

    Sincerly, your own weblog crazy man or woman.

  6. diblog says:

    Yeah, emerge – that “deep inside opening” could be about being in the hole financially – or it COULD be a direct reference to birth and all that pushing I had to do…

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